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Kid You Not believes in the Wizard of Oz style of parenting: All you need is a brain, some courage and a heart. Oh, and some Jager.

Wednesday, September 09, 2009

What the president should have told my daughter


President Obama’s school pep talk went over well and all the kooks who kept their kids out of school or had them sit in the cafeteria during the speech are probably feeling foolish. Most kids watched the speech and hopefully the president’s message of paying attention in class and working hard got through to them. I just wish Obama could have expanded his message to include some of the issues I have to deal with.
Something like this:
“...at the end of the day, we can have the most dedicated teachers, the most supportive parents, and the best schools in the world – and none of it will matter unless all of you fulfill your responsibilities. Unless you show up to those schools; pay attention to those teachers; listen to your parents, grandparents and other adults; and put in the hard work it takes to succeed.
“And for you fourth graders, I’d like to ask you to get up on time so you don’t have to run around like a crazy person five minutes before the bus gets here looking for the blue homework folder and your reading log. And don’t take 10 minutes to decide what you want for breakfast so your father doesn’t lose 10 precious newspaper-reading minutes waiting for you to decide between the corn flakes or the bagel.
“You should provide your parents with a detailed description of your school activities at dinnertime, not a one syllable word like “fine” or “good” followed by a complaint that the kids who get hot lunch had an “icy juicy” for dessert and you had yogurt. Also, try and remember what day is gym class so you don’t have to change from shoes to sneakers 30 seconds before the bus gets here.
“It would be helpful of you’d stop asking for a $10 dry erase board that fits in your locker so you can write messages to the person who shares your locker. The person who’s standing next to you everytime you’re at the locker. And don’t bring up what kind of backpack you want for fifth grade, two weeks after getting a new shoulder bag for fourth grade. Thank you, God bless you, and God bless America.”
Now that would be a great speech. And lastly, Mr. President, if you’re reading, could you have someone in your administration please tell me what an “icy juicy” is.

3 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Not sure how the Wizard of Oz approach to parenting jives with a message that implies that their current level of effort is inadequate and that they need to more rigorously honor the highly fallible adults that they encounter.

11:33 PM 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Huh?

4:06 PM 
Blogger Kimmiek said...

You sound like agoofball parent.. Fun loving adn great to be around.. However I must say i can't agree one percent on the picking on the parents who had their kids sit out on the speech.
They should stand up for what they beleive in and are not to be called "feeling Foolish"

. Who needs the President playing with the minds of our children.?
Not me.
Thats' up to us parents to teach morals & values to our kids.
He can go to the Ghettos in Chicago. He should feel foolish wastign allteh taxpayers money going to try to get teh Olympics brought to Chigaco... lol what a waste of gasoline diesle fuel time..... payment fo rhis security.. Flight..... everythign.. Shame on Americans who stand behind this smooth talke He is a man who reads a teleprompter & is lost without it.. :{
Boooo Hissss and have talks there if he wishes. That is truly & clearly where they are needed.

5:36 PM 

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